A Good Doctor

I wrote this blog post in June 2010 and never published it. I am posting it now because I reference it in a new blog. This blog post will make sense within the context of the new blog.


Yes, there is such a thing. I had a feeling this was going to be one of them. His reputation is the best in town. I hadn’t seen him before because the wait to see him is long. Two and a half years ago, when I was begging to be seen by an otolaryngologist at the medical center, this doctor was recommended. I can’t help thinking how everything might have been different if I could have waited to see him. But I couldn’t wait. I was smothering, crying, pacing, pounding the walls. So I took the “first available” with Dr. F. Dr. F contrived to cover up the damage that had been done to me by an un-board-certified ENT—the unnecessary bone amputation from my face, the tunnels drilled through my head, the ripped-out mucosa, the acinetobacter infection.  When I kept getting sick and having infections, the lies had to be covered up with increasing vehemence and cruelty until I was buried in them and could not get help for any of the conditions that flourished after the “surgeries.”

Since Christmas, I have been increasingly ill with ongoing infection, fevers, sweats, chills, nausea, and pain in my face that has reached levels during which I have been crazed and incoherent with pain. My face has caved in on both sides, but more on the right. The first doctor I saw for the pan and facial collapse told me I needed to see a different doctor. The second doctor told me I was describing a sinus infection.  He ordered three weeks of Bactrim and referred me to three other specialists.  I refused to take the Bactrim until I got a bone scan. There ensued a cat-and-mouse game in which the doctors I saw tried to keep me from getting a bone scan and I tried to outsmart them. I hate games, but what are you gonna do when you’re playing for your life? I can’t afford to be a snob. I am hardly in a position to say, “Oh, this is so childish. I’m not going to play.”

In the end, I got the bone scan, but not until I had taken the three weeks of Bactrim. The results are hazy, as they would be following a course of strong antibiotics. The Bactrim knocked the pain way back, but just as I suspected it would, it started to build back up a few weeks after I finished the drug. My teeth started crashing together. This is what would happen if the infection were osteomyelitis as Bactrim is not strong enough to kill off a bone infection. You need intravenous Vancomycin for that. So I have been desperately trying to get doctors to help me, but as I fought for the bone scan, reams of false documentation were created, calls were made, doors were slammed in my face.  I am not a person to these doctors. I am “damage control.” Lies have been documented about my conditions and they must, at all costs, be substantiated. This is “medicine” in America.

But not entirely. I saw a doctor today. I told him what has been happening to me. “I’m sorry,” he said. “That’s doctors. “ No surprise. No doubt. No attempt to sweep it under the rug.

“Come this way,” he said. “I want you to meet someone.” He took me into the room of his assistant and he told her exactly what I had told him. She looked at me with alarm and sympathy. “Set aside an hour next Monday,” he said. “We will call around and find someone to see her for this.” “This” is probable osteomyelitis.  He wanted me to meet someone alright—a good doctor and a decent human being.

I am amazed. I am heartened. Even if it is too late to help me, now, I will not feel as hopeless about the human condition. I will not be as angry and broken-hearted.  I have met a good doctor. In fact, I have met a few. It must take an enormous amount of moral courage to stand straight in a den of liars and thieves . I believe that one good doctor can spoil the whole bunch.  I hope the little bit of goodness I’ve seen just festers and takes over the whole profession.

~ by ens3 on November 4, 2017.

One Response to “A Good Doctor”

  1. […] to slip this in. This is a blog post I wrote in June 2010, and never posted. (I just posted it.): https://ens3.wordpress.com/2017/11/04/a-good-doctor/ ‎You see the words “good doctor” in there. This is a doctor many of you have seen […]

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