Deathly Ill

January 15-23, 2008

 

I developed huge swellings beneath my eyes. I had agonizing pain in my hipbones. My nose was a burning, dry gulch.

 

On January 16, I got worse. I was unable to get enough air. Underneath my eyes, was dark blue/back. My whole face was blue. Something was terribly wrong, and I was angry with Dr. F. that he had not ordered scans, or any tests at all, in December. Why did I not have information about my condition? Why did I not feel that I had a doctor caring for me? I was all alone with my terror.

 

I had severe respiratory congestion and cough. The blue-black swellings under my eyes got worse. I lay very still in bed for days. On the nineteenth, a Saturday, I called my GP who called a prescription for Augmentin into my pharmacy.

 

On the twenty-third, my scheduled appointment with Dr. F. rolled around. I was on my fifth day of Augmentin. Dr. F. said that my sinuses were severely infected. He suctioned and suctioned the pus out.

 

Dr. F. told me that I had a condition that could not be cured. I didn’t think to ask him what condition. I was almost too sick to sit up. Later, I realized that he must have meant atrophic rhinitis. He said I could only be made more comfortable. I asked how. He mentioned surgery and medication.

 

I showed him a photo of me taken three months before my surgery. He acknowledged that my nose was smaller, now, and different.